Doing it for the story

****CROSS-POSTED from the friendshipisnonpartisan blog****

So I've been, like, beyond neglectful in my contributions to this blog. In my defense, life has been a steady whirlwind of interviewing, picture-taking, littering the internet with cross-posted video to draw attention to McCain's OPPOSITION to "Buy American" provisions (because why should the Secret Service ride around on American-made motorcycles??), preparing for a visit from the boss, deciding which impromptu press conferences are worth my time and which events might get me into legal trouble, occasionally drinking with various local politicos ("C didn't ask me to go drinking with you guys when he called earlier." My coworker's response was instantaneous: "That's because C doesn't like you." "Good," I said, "I don't like him either."), dragging myself out of bed at 4am for the unique union event that is the worksite leaflet ("You know, you learn a lot about a person at a 5am worksite leaflet." "I bet you do...") and getting asked out by scruffy union guys and having to tactfully yet forcefully decline.

Which reminds me, a new staffer arrived last week from national, and we instantly hit it off. "So have you dated since you've been in Wisconsin?" she asked.

"Well," I replied. "I went on one godawful boring date with a vegan, I was hooking up for a minute with this guy but now that's done, and I guess I pretty much have my pick of the building trades."

In summary, I'm still pretty much doing it all for the story.

Things My Friends Say: Really, really (really!) gay edition

"You know, my day would have a whole lot less meaning if I wasn't your pet."
- Mitz, commenting on my ability to make him accompany me to various office locales (coffee machine, copier, basement) with just an arched eyebrow and a head toss.

"It just doesn't tend to end well with people who are white."
- Jay-ber, explaining why he doesn't date people of his own ethnicity.

"I would expect nothing less from casetheplace and a gay man."
- Out-of-town guest, regarding some long since forgotten anecdote.

"Is it a penis...oh, no, it's a bunny."
- (This one is actually a casetheplace said, when handed an Easter-themed lollipop by the Religion & Faith program intern.)

"I'm working for a big ol' gay organization and I don't know who the biggest homos are."
- Jay-ber, on why he needed to spend time studying Out magazine's Power 50 list.

"Casetheplace is like Google for Georgia - no, the whole South!"
- Jay-ber (again, I know! This kid is full of it - er, I mean, them, full of them), after I once again had to explain some Atlanta-ism or Southern-ism none of the Northerners and Midwesterners understood.

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Bounce wit me

Last night in Baltimore, HT pointed to me and said, "You can always tell ATL kids by the way that they bounce when they dance."

And yeah, I was bouncing. (To house music. At a rave. With glow sticks. I don't want to talk about it too much, but I will say apparently the universe has preserved a little bit of the late 90s rave scene in Baltimore. JNCOS, people! And the rhinestone bebe shirt every girl in my high school and every other high school in America sported when I was a freshman in 1997. And did I mention there were actual glowsticks??)

The DC kids with ATL connections loooove to talk about ATL when I'm around. "Remember that one time in ATL? Did you ever go to that club in ATL? Did you ever drink at that bar in ATL? Remember that party in ATL? Where did you live in ATL? ATL ATL ATL..." Which is kinda sweet and cute, all the ATL love, especially since I rep the A pretty hard up here (although I think I should be slapped, personally, the next time drunk casetheplace shouts and signs "Peace out! A-town down!" for no good reason, cause I do it waaaay too much, I'm not gonna lie...), but hey, look, I'm not in ATL anymore, and I don't plan to return anytime soon, and all that's for some very good reasons, and you're not in ATL these days either, so can we maybe not talk about ATL all the damn time? Thank you, 'preciate it.

But, um, while we're on the subject of ATL, here's some funny, funny, funniness. Especially if you've ever been a MARTA rider ("Isn't the Metro so much better than MARTA?" "SmarTrip's like a BREEZE card." "The buses here don't suck like MARTA buses." "I got hit by a MARTA bus once."). Oh, and in case you don't know what HT meant by bounce, there's some definite bounce in this:

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Fresca Friday

Happy Fresca Friday, y'all! Mitz declared today Fresca Friday because yesterday a bunch of us interns were giving him shit about his drinking Fresca.

"What are you, an old woman?" we all said. "Are you gonna start drinking Tab now too?"

Mitz tried to defend his Fresca drinking as not being old ladyish by reading us a printout of the Wikipedia entry for the drink ("Historian Doris Kearns Goodwin wrote that Fresca was the favorite drink of U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson, who had a button installed on the desk in the White House's Oval Office which would summon his military aide to bring the drink. In addition, Fresca was the favorite drink of the expansion teams in the NHL during the 1967 season"...Lyndon B. Johnson, people! And hockey players! They're not old ladies! Oh, and it's been featured in three - three! - episodes of The Simpsons! And The Daily Show!), but then Mitz made the mistake of mentioning that he was going on an evening river cruise on the Potomac next week, and all hell broke loose.

"You ARE an old woman! Look, he's even wearing a cardigan!"

Today, Mitz busted into the office with a stack of Dixie cups and a can of Fresca. "Who's ready to break down some beverage stereotypes??" he asked.

He then distributed the cups, and poured us each an inch of Fresca. I hadn't had Fresca in years, and I have to say, it tastes just as bizarre now as it did in the Nineties. (Sorry, Mitz, but I won't be joining you in old lady soft drink land on the regular.)

A lot of other things happened today, most notably my wiping out at 9:10 this morning on K Street. It was quite spectacular, with the coffee flying out of my hand and the sprawled out landing that slightly twisted my left ankle and tore open my right knee. It really knocked the wind out of me, and it took me a moment till I could let LG help me up. Everyone was all concerned about me being hurt, and all I could manage to get out was, "My coffee..." in a rather woeful voice. My skinned knee would heal with time, but the coffee seeping into the uneven cracks of the sidewalk was gone forever.

And here's a great thing one of my friends said today:

"Do squirrels eat worms? Like, in times of scarcity, do they eat worms? I saw one eating a worm today and I was like, Wow, it must be tough for them if they've moved on to worms..."

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Things my friends say

I'm trying to do a better job of writing down the hilarious shit my hilariously awesome friends say. Here are a few from this week:

"The only 'g' word I love is 'gummy bear' - or 'Ginger spice.' I LOVE her!"

"I had to turn the light on when we were doing it because I forgot what he looked like. (pause) Isn't that bad?"

"I know I'm a gay man, but culturally, I'm a lesbian."

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